Redeeming Moments from the Redeemer

My kids - Hard to handle? naahhh... haha - actually, they can be extremely challenging sometimes. It is difficult enough trying to talk to a 5 year old when there is a language barrier, but when you add on top of that that most of these kids have barely had any regularity, consistency, discipline other than physical punishment, or proper nurturing, it can be an overwhelming thing. And that is why every good moment matters and is an encouragement. 

Yesterday, I handed a boy at the door something and he walked away without saying thank you. Melissa called out to him, "You can't say thank you?" A minute later, he poked his head in again and said, very sincerely, "Gracias, Jenna." What a simple thing it is! But to know this young man is to know that this simple response and action is a huge thing for him. Every child is different. Each has different challenges... And God is working. Sometimes interactions can be so frustrating because you feel like nothing is getting through and what is the point if they are never going to change (does this sound familiar?), but then God shares with me a moment with one of the kids that says, "See? They do hear. They are learning. They do see. And they will know me."  Last week, I reminded 6 year old Wisguebi to have patience waiting for his turn on the bike. He looked up at me, got a thoughtful look and then in his sweet stutter told me that he also wanted love and joy and peace. We have been going through the Fruit of the Spirit for Sunday school... Thank you, Lord.

On one hand, I say that I have the easiest job and ask why God would put me here to love on kids and get colored pictures all the time and hugs and smiles and to fix booboos and laugh together! This is the greatest! ... But I have been learning more recently, as the kids get more comfortable with me and realize that I am here as an adult with some authority, rather than just a friend and a play thing, that life is challenging. Sometimes it is just overwhelming and exhausting and frustrating to have four or five kids hanging on you all the time, calling your name in four different directions, needing you for eight different things, teasing, touching, pulling, jumping, shouting, crying... haha! 

This is my reality. 

But then I have a magic moment -

Kiki (4) comes for a hug and tells me I am a princess, or SonSon (11) hands me another beautifully colored picture, or I communicate with laughter with one of the older boys, or I surprise them by responding to whatever they have been saying in Creole, or I watch the face of Wisguebi (6) light up as I am able to say "yes" when he asks if he can wash the big dishes - and then everything is worth it. I could not be any place other than where I am now. My Papa Dios is gracious to give me such firm assurance.

Sometimes I cry because of the things I hear and see. I have even asked God why - why is there a village of people only a few miles away who have absolutely no resources (including access to fresh water!) and why are they allowed to live like that? Why did my kids have to go through the things that they did? Why did Alicia and Avila's mom have to die? Why was there a flood in town that killed Gabriel's family? Why was someone trying to hurt little Kimi?  ... And I wrestle with all these things, but I just have to trust that God is good and that he has a plan. 

There are bad things in the world because sin entered in and continued through all generations, but that is why God provided a way for us to be eternally separated from all the sin and yuck in the world through Jesus Christ. I know that He cares about every single one of these kids and wants them to run to Him. He wants to be their Father when they have none. He wants to be their Comforter when they are sad and their Healer when they are sick. He wants them to know His Love even when they feel unlovable  and to know that they are set free in Christ from the burdens of guilt and shame. I trust that He desires good, and so even when I do not understand, I trust Him.

It is not always easy...

But I have trusted in your steadfast love; my heart shall rejoice in your salvation. I will sing to the Lord, because he has dealt bountifully with me. (Psalm 13:5-6)